Change of plans...maybe?

 As the title suggests, there may be a shift in my film opening.  I though I would just get right into it.  

The original:

This is what I started with, and I liked it, it's definitely a concept, but I think one of the bigger issues with it was that the story wasn't really leading anywhere.  There was some sort of build up, but nothing too crazy, so I sat down in class today and worked on this:

This is the new and "improved" storyboard.  It's still not necessarily where I want it to be yet, but the idea is there.  I think I want to do a mix of both my old storyboard and my new storyboard.  They are fairly similar, which will be easier for me when I get to finalizing it.  Anyways, here's the new one.  It's a lot more than the last, so I feel like I should break it up into pieces, page by page.

Page 1:

Starting off, we can see two people walking down a driveway with luggage.  These are Lilly's parents, and they're going away on a trip, maybe just for the weekend.  Then we see Lilly waving goodbye, and locking the door.  The main point of this is to establish that she is alone.  Next, she gets on the phone and starts to call her boyfriend, it's hard to see, but at the same time, she is opening her liquor cabinet.  Again, we see that she is alone, and taking the opportunity to be a rebellious teenager, so she'll poor herself a drink and get to writing on her laptop.  Similar to the original storyboard, she'll get a text from an unknown person, look confused, and open it to find pictures of herself in her current position.

Page 2:

Onto the next page.  Again, this is very similar to the old storyboard, but she'll look around and see her window door open, so she'll get back up to close it, and continue messaging the unknown person.  Then, her doorbell rings, and at first she's confused, but realizes that it's her boyfriend, or so she thinks.

Page 3:

Lilly pours a drink to have ready for him, goes to her bathroom and checks herself in the mirror to make sure she looks okay, and then will get up to get the door.  This is when she opens the door to find a masked villain, who's name I have not yet figured out, nor the look of the mask, and they stab her.  She looks down at herself with blood on her hands, and wakes up.  She is wearing the same outfit.  She thinks she dreamt it, but she then opens up her phone to get a text from an unknown person, the same villain, saying "sleep well?"

Page 4:

On the last page of the storyboard, she gets out of her room, and walks into her mom's room.  There is luggage there, ready to go.  Lilly tries to say something, but walks out the door and decides not to talk to her.  She decides to sit down on her bed, in which she'll get a text from the same unknown person, and it'll say: "Too scared to talk to mommy?" Next, we'll see a shot of her, and she'll say, what the hell.  Finally, we'll see her locking her door and going back to her phone, trying to figure out what she's gonna do about it, but at the same time it's like she's brushing the situation off her shoulder.  Maybe I'll add in some cameo of the masked villain at the end for a small jump scare?

I know I only have two minutes of time, and maybe I have a lot sketched out, but I know that I could easily make changes if I needed to.  I do really like the story I have for right now, and I can't wait to write it!